Monday, March 7, 2016

Mothering Monday: Car Talks

Sometimes the journey to the destination becomes the destination itself. Driving often feels like a mundane, frustrating chore because you can't really multi-task. A certain level of concentration and attention must be paid to the road, the car, and the environment. Perhaps it is this relaxing of scrutiny that my oldest son enjoys when we sit in the car, side by side, while I take him to appointments or activities.

Without prodding he tells me about school, teachers, and his research project. We talk about his future plans and he share possible scenarios with me. I try to listen more than I talk. When I offer suggestions, they are phrased as possibilities.

As we drive, I realize that we are both in transition, moving from place to another. He is moving towards adulthood and independence. I am moving toward a new phase of parenting this young man. Our relationship to one another is in flux and we negotiate our positions, sometimes jostling and tense, other times fluid and sure. We both know the eventual destination and final assignment of roles but the journey in unfamiliar to both of us.  Our car talks have become landmarks on our journey that we remember and appreciate.


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